And We All Fall Down
by PCGirl
Summary: After the truth about the ONS comes out the consequences are faced, and decisions by all parties must be made.  Which relationships can be salvaged above all odds? John/Natalie
1. Chapter 1

A/N: YAY! New story time! That's always exciting, isn't it? hehehe-hope ya'll enjoy! Until next time-PCGirl.

* * *

"How are you feeling?" asked Gigi as she stood behind the bar at Rodi's. She'd taken Natalie to the doctor's and then home yesterday after the amniocentesis.

"A little sore, but the paperwork the doctor gave me said I would feel that for a day or two. I'm just ready to find out the results."

"Of what—is something wrong with the baby?"

Natalie twirled around to see Marty standing there behind her, "Oh, hey Marty. No, everything is fine with the baby."

"I saw both of you yesterday leaving the hospital—you said, results—did you have an amnio done? Does John know?"

"You know, Marty—I'm sorry, but this really doesn't concern you," said Natalie as she tried to shake the other woman off.

"Why are you hiding something from him? You finally got him back, and here you are already keeping secrets about his child from him. Wait—it's not John's, is it?"

"Excuse me? Where did that come from?"

"If it really was nothing John would know, and he would have been with you for the procedure—and you wouldn't be freaking out at the accusation."

"I believe that accusation, in any situation, is worth freaking out over. And no—I have never cheated on John," she said defiantly, proud that at least in all this that last statement was still true.

"Then tell me why you needed an amniocentesis? You seemed honest when you said nothing was wrong with the baby. Why put your unborn child through one otherwise?"

"Fine—you want to know what happened?" shouted Natalie, ignoring Gigi's plea for her to stop. "John didn't show up at midnight at Rodi's because someone decided it would be best to steal the letter I'd left him. So I got myself drunk, went over to my sister's boyfriend's apartment to tell him goodbye, and we ended up having sex. Happy?"shouted Natalie into Marty's face.

"Natalie?" called a shaky voice from behind, and she looked to see Jessica, Brody, and John standing there. "Hey guys," she said, trying to show a smile and keep her voice from shaking.

"You—did you say you slept with Brody?" asked Jessica as she walked towards her sister and everyone else for the moment seemed to melt into the background.

Natalie felt her world come crashing down at the question, "I'm so sorry Jess. It was the night of the Prom, and we were both upset. We never planned for it to happen—I swear."

"So that makes it all ok? That because your life was in shambles you decided to destroy mine as well?"

"It wasn't like that—I never meant to hurt you, Jess. You are my sister."

"No, the only sister I have is dead," she spat at Natalie.

Natalie felt her nightmares becoming reality and wasn't how much blame she could handle. Looking at Brody he was useless—in the end she knew he'd throw her under the bus if it meant keeping his relationship with Jessica. She wanted to look at John—wanted to see his face, but was scared to know what was showing in his eyes-anger or hurt. Pleading with her sister as tears came down her face she spoke with as strong of a voice as she could find, "I know you don't mean that Jess. And one day—I'll make this right, I swear I will."

Finally she glanced at John and realized she couldn't read him right now. Keeping her eyes glued to his she said one final thing before rushing out the back door of Rodi's, "I'm so sorry."

* * *

Natalie blinked through the tears as she made it up the drive to the cottage. How she'd gotten here through the crying and hysterics she didn't know, but she was here. Rex was at the driver's door before she was parked, and pulled her into a bear hug, "Hey—it's going to be ok."

"No, no it's not. I lost my sister today, I know it," she mumbled into Rex's shirt. "And John—I could barely look at him. He was just standing there—I have no clue what he's feeling."

"It doesn't matter, Natty. Because there are two things that won't change in all of this," he said as she finally pulled away from him and he was able to see her face. "You are going to be an amazing mom, and I will be the most awesome Uncle ever." 

* * *

John stood at the door and looked around-he shouldn't be doing this now. Sober and straight minded would work better in this situation, but he really didn't care.

What he was about to do was what he wanted to do this afternoon, but had instead left Rodi's and tried to bury himself in cases. Then he'd gone and closed up Rodi's for the night-drinking himself into the stupor that he was in now.

As the door opened he gave himself a few seconds to see if the thought that had been rushing around in his head most of the day would subside, when it didn't he let his fist come in direct contact with Brody's nose.

As the man stumbled back he walked into the room uninvited and closed the door, "Get up," he shouted as he pulled Brody back to his feet and shoved him up against the door so they were eye level. "Are you proud of yourself? Proud that you took advantage of a vulnerable woman and ruined her whole life."

"There were two of us in this room that night, John," he said as he shoved John away and tried to stop the bleeding.

"Yeah, and do you remember the oath you made when you became a cop? Serve and protect. She came to you as a friend, Brody. A friend!"

"We regretted it the moment it happened. Talk to Natalie-she wanted you to know from the beginning, but I couldn't do that to Jess."

"Then I guess you have more apologizing to do than anyone else in this," said John as he decided it was best to leave before he did something worse than just deck his partner.


	2. Chapter 2

Natalie walked into the kitchen at Llanfair and sighed. Her mom had called Gigi earlier—told her that she was taking Jessica and Bree to the park. She hadn't asked how Natalie was—but had said if she needed to come get some clothes now would probably be the best time.

GIgi had come with her, but left for class before Natalie had finished. She glanced back down at the note she'd found on her bed—maybe the one bit of light she had in this whole situation.

_Natalie,_

_Hope you are doing ok, and that you understand why I need to focus on Jessica right now._

_Love,_

_Mom_

While she did understand, a part of her was still upset. Upset that like any other time her mom was focusing on the child she raised first. Placing her hand on her stomach she wondered how this child would be treated. Would it still come second to Jessica's children?

Lost in thoughts she didn't hear the footsteps as she walked into the kitchen and stopped, "Hey—you seen your mom?"

She looked up to see Todd there and watched as he calmly walked over and grabbed an apple out of the basket, and then taking a chomp out of it. "Her and Jess took Bree to the park."

"Cool," he said as he looked down and saw the suitcases. "You and McBain finally shacking up together? I mean it's obvious ya'll have already done _that_," he finished with a grin as he looked down at her bump.

"Ha," she said as she found no humor in anything at the moment. "Actually, I'm staying with Rex and Gigi."

"So what happened?"

"Excuse me?"

"Something must have for you to move out of here and in with your brother," he said as he studied her face and saw the emotion in her eyes. "What is it? Come on—confide in your Uncle Todd. I'll hear about it soon enough anyways," he said as he followed her around the kitchen island.

"No, because you'll make it your front headline, and I can't do that to John."

"Try me."

"I thought I'd lost John for good, and Brody thought the sameeyHeyH about Jessica and we found comfort in each other. It was one night, and it was stupid."

Todd laughed, "Sounds like something I would do. Maybe I have," he said as he stopped and thought hard. "Don't worry—I won't publish it, but not for McBain—I could care less about that guy. I won't do it for Jessica."

"Gee, thanks," she said as she grabbed her suitcases and left.

* * *

Bo walked into Rodi's and saw something he didn't expect, an empty bar except for John sitting at it with a bottle of whiskey next to him, "You open?"

"Not really, but you can join me," he said as he pushed back a chair for his boss and grabbed an empty shot glass from over the bar.

"I got your message this morning about wanting to take a few days off. Is this what you're planning on doing the whole time?"

"Not really sure yet," he said as he took a shot back.

"Also saw Brody with a brand new shiner. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"

John tweaked his jaw a bit to try and come up with the most professional answer—a few others rolling through his head, and him nixing each of them. "I let my emotions get the best of me—I felt he'd taken advantage of a vulnerable situation and I was upset about it. It won't happen again, Bo."

Bo had to almost laugh at John's response, "Ok. Well, let's talk about this vulnerable situation."

John rubbed his hands over his face. He hadn't said it out loud, "Natalie was vulnerable and he might have gotten her pregnant."

Bo nodded as he took a sip of the whiskey, having already heard the story from his brother who had wanted Bo to fire his niece—a move he would never do. "I see."

"It was unprofessional. I'm sorry—can we change subjects?" he asked, he could handle any other subject but this one—it was too raw still to think about.

"No. You don't have to take any advice I give, but just listen," he said as he leaned back in his chair. "When I look at yours and Natalie's relationship I see myself and Nora. How we would let stupid stuff get between us and wasted years apart that we could have spent together.

"I didn't think Matthew was mine—so I wasn't there for his birth, for his first words, or his first steps. I missed out on a lot. But you know what—it doesn't matter. He's an awesome kid, and what I should have done was stepped up and said I wanted to be his father. That DNA didn't matter. I loved his mom, and I would love him just as much.

"I understand if you feel like you can't step up and do that. But I know you John—I think you'll do the right thing," he said as he got up and threw a couple bills on the counter.

John took the money and handed it back, "No good here—but the advice is. Thanks, Bo," smirked John as he watched him leave—leaving him alone with more to think about.

* * *

Natalie wondered once again why she was doing this. If John wanted to talk he'd find her—he always found her, but it'd be silence for the past few days, and she'd learned through other parties that he'd taken a leave from work. Had to get some stuff settled, she'd been told by one person.

Hearing the vacuum running on the other side of the door she knocked hard and shouted his name, "John. Open up."

She hadn't expected to see Roxy open the door, "Where's John?"

"He said he had to leave town for a few days, this was after he gave notice that he was moving out."

"He's moving?" asked Natalie, her voice betraying her just enough so her emotions got the best of her.

"I guess so," she shrugged. "Hey, you can't expect him to raise a kid in this place. Even I have standards—you should know that."

She tried to laugh through the comment, but it came out strangled as she walked in and sat down on the couch, "I'm not sure that's going to happen anyways, Rox."

"Why wouldn't it? You just have to say the word baby and his face lights up like a big old Christmas tree. Did something happen?"

"You haven't heard?" she said, surprised that the entire town wasn't ready to stone her. "I slept with Brody."

"What? Why would you do a stupid thing like that?"

"Because someone let me hang my beliefs on the idea of true love, and when it didn't work out and it seemed like I was going to London after all I went to say goodbye to Brody. We never meant for it to happen, and regretted it when it did," she said as she laid her head in her hands and began to sob. "How could he leave me without saying goodbye first?" she muffled as Roxy pulled her into a hug and held her.

* * *

John watched as the exit sign he was looking for came up. He'd thought long enough about what his decision needed to be. Battling between the two choices in front of him—in the end only one choice mattered. As he took his exit he sighed and spoke to himself, "Here we go."


	3. Chapter 3

Answering the cottage door Rex found John standing outside waiting. Taking a glance up the stairs he decided he'd get rid of John before Natalie came down to see who it was.

"McBain," he greeted and put himself between it and the half open door. "Heard you'd left town-guess Roxy was wrong."

"Guess so. Is Natalie in?" he asked, realizing that if Rex thought he'd left town, then so did Natalie. At seeing the look on Rex's face he answered the unspoken question, "I figured this was the only place she had to go. And you're the one person that's never turned their back on her."

Rex nodded, "She's here, but if you're coming just to break her heart-."

John sighed and looked around, "I'm glad she has you in her life, but this is between me and her, Balsom."

"I understand that, but-," he said as he heard movement on the stairs and turned to see Natalie standing there in an oversized t-shirt and sweats.

"Let him in, Rex," she said as she stood there with her arms crossed. She had wondered when she'd see John again-if he'd left Llanview for good, or just in order to think. Taking him in she realized it was the later, but she couldn't read the decision he'd made.

He began to argue with her, but she gave him a pleading look so he stopped, "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me," he said as he walked to her, gave her a kiss on the forehead before leaving.

"Who knew both of our brother's could be guard dogs," she said, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, who knew," shrugged John as he walked in and studied her. He'd enjoyed watching her grow through the pregnancy, the small changes he'd notice after a few days. "You're starting to show more."

Natalie shook her head to argue, "It's only been a couple of days, John."

John got closer to her and pushed her hair out of her face, resting his hand on her neck to keep the connection he'd been missing, "You think I don't know every inch of your body?"

"John," she swallowed, trying to keep her emotions in check. "Why are you here?"

"We need to talk," he said as he looked around. "But not here-will you come with me?"

"I-" she began to argue.

"Trust, please?" he asked, ready to pick her up and carry her out here if need be.

Natalie wanted to laugh-here he was asking her to trust him, when it should be the other way around. "Ok, but I want to take my own car and follow you."

* * *

Natalie was puzzled as she followed John into the parking lot of an apartment complex close to the station. She hadn't been sure where they were going-perhaps the roof to talk. Pulling into the spot next to John she wondered exactly why he would bring her here. "Why are we here, John?" she asked as she got out of the car.

John said nothing, just kept up the stairs, putting in a code to enter the building. Natalie kept following him as he led the way to a second floor apartment.

"So this is where you moved to?" she asked, and again was greeted with silence. Going in she started taking the place in. The open floor plan gave you the kitchen to the right and a large living room area to the left with a fireplace and picture windows overlooking Llantano River. "It's nice," she said as she walked to the windows and looked out. Turning her arms were crossed at her chest, and she sighed. "But what does it mean, John? You've said nothing since we left Rex's. I need answers-if you're bringing me here to let me down then just do it," she said as her voice cracked and she could feel herself on the verge of tears.

"Come in here," he said as he walked down the hallway. As much as he wanted to take her in his arms right now, he wanted to do this right as well and follow the plan he'd formed on the way back to Llanview.

Reaching a bedroom Natalie noticed tt was good size, but not seeing the others she wasn't sure if it was the master or not. In the corner sat a well loved rocking chair. "John?" she spoke through a trembling voice.

"It was my Mom's. She rocked both me and Mike in it when we were babies. I figured you'd need one, so I went to AC and picked it up."

"Does this mean-?" she stopped herself from completing the sentence in case she was about to fall.

"I'm sorry. Sorry for that a moment you thought I would leave town and not tell you. Sorry that you had to question how much I want you and our child for even a second."

"Ours?"

"No matter what the paternity test says-I promise," he said as he placed both his hands on her face and kissed her gently. "I love you, Natalie. Always," he said and then pulled her into a fierce hug.

* * *

John walked into the apartment and at the sight he thought he might want to go back out and call for reinforcements. Of course, that could piss her off worse than she already was so it probably wasn't the best idea.

"Hey-everything ok in here?" he asked as watched Natalie standing at the kitchen island with a master and putting some poor defenseless potatoes out of their misery.

"Yeah," she said as she kept jabbing the metal instrument into the bowl harder. "Your child wants homemade mashed potatoes tonight," she said through gritted teeth.

"When did you stop liking them?" he asked as he placed his hand on her stomach and she calmed immediately. In the weeks since they moved in here together he hadn't seen her upset over much-unless it was about her family.

"I didn't," she said as she stopped and looked at him.

"Sit," he said as he took her hand and led her to the couch, "What's wrong?" he asked, wondering if she knew the results of the paper in his pocket already.

Natalie took a deep sigh before picking off imaginary lint from her jeans, "Awhile back I made a decision and I put most of my inheritance into a trust for my children."

"When you were with Cramer, right?"

"Yeah," she said, smiling that John would remember something insignificant such as that. "I made it so I couldn't even get into it. Well, I got a call from my financial adviser-the one Kevin set me up with so I could start it. Apparently my dad is trying to get his hands on the money. How could he do that to his grandchild?"

John sighed, he wasn't sure what he could say to make it better, "If he wants the money that bad let him have it."

"John-."

"Don't tell me to no, Natalie. He's been an ass to you for weeks now, and I won't let him hurt you or our kid," he said as he pulled out the envelope and handed it to her.

"Where did you get this?" she asked, shocked that he was carrying it around.

"Had to interview someone at the hospital this morning-Doc gave it to me."

"You've been carrying it around all day?"

John nodded, "Thought about just tossing it a few times-it doesn't matter, Natalie. I'm in love with this child because it's yours."

Natalie nodded as she took a deep breath and pulled the letter out of the envelope. She'd been avoiding these results-avoiding the truth that this child growing inside her wasn't John's and despite his constant promises not to, would resent it.

John watched Natalie-it was killing her to do this, and in his heart already he knew it didn't matter, "Nevermind. We don't need a piece of paper to tell us what we know," he said as he grabbed the paper and went towards the fireplace.

"No, John," she said as she followed him and grabbed his arm. She watched as he dropped the paper and it seemed to magically fall open. He leaned over to get it, not having a choice now on ignoring the results. Watching his face he masked any emotions and the fear that had eaten away at her during most of the pregnancy resurfaced, "John-please say something."

He looked up-his eyes locking with hers and couldn't help smiling, "Looks like the poor kid's going to be a McBain through and through. Hope he has your looks."

"Not a chance," she grinned brighter than she had the whole pregnancy. "Guess you really are stuck with me now."

"Guess so," he grinned, as he pulled her towards him, and then slowly to the floor in front of the fireplace.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry for the delay-finicky muse to blame. Not completely thrilled with this chapter, but it moves the story forward. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time-PCGirl.

* * *

Natalie was focused on the boy clothes in front of her at Logan's. While the sex of the baby was still a surprise lately she kept being pulled towards the racks of boy outfits. At first she'd brushed it off as to buying Christmas presents for Gabe-but with the gifts having been sent last week she couldn't use the excuse anymore.

Lost in her thoughts she didn't hear someone calling her name until they placed a hand on her shoulder. Turning she saw her mom, "Mom, hey."

"Oh, Natalie," said Vicki as she embraced her child in a hug. "I've missed you so much-look at you," she said as she pulled out of the embrace. "Sweetheart, you are absolutely glowing."

"Thanks," she said, feeling suddenly awkward around her mom. Since she'd left Llanfair that day with her stuff she hadn't seen or heard from her. The only family she'd had contact with was Bo, which was a relationship she knew would stand the test of time. "How's Jessica?" she asked, ready to take the spotlight off of herself.

"Good. She misses you."

"Did she say that?" asked Natalie, her hopes rising some that maybe there was still something from their sisterhood that could be salvaged.

"No, but I can tell. You've been in her life all these years and it's been hard on her for you to be suddenly out of it again," said Vicki as she saw the disbelief in Natalie's eyes. "We are planning on decorating the tree this weekend. Why don't you and John come over and join us?"

"Mom-I really don't know."

"Please, Natalie. I need my girls together-for me," she said as she took Natalie's hands and held them tight, her eyes giving a silent plea.

"I'll-I'll think about it," she spoke, not able to decline the invitation in front of her mother. "If I do, what time do you think we should come?" she asked.

"How about five? We'll have dinner and then start work on the tree."

"Sure, mom," she said with a nod. Once Viki had given her a last hug and left Natalie wondered exactly what she'd gotten herself into just now.

* * *

Natalie walked into the apartment and immediately heard a curse followed by banging come from one of the bedrooms. Placing her bags by the door she followed the sound, and realized it was coming from the nursery.

The scene before her made her grin-here was John, who would run into a burning building without a second thought, dumbfounded on putting the crib together, "You could catch bad guys in your sleep, but not this?"

"It's not funny," he said with a slight grin while trying to read the directions again. "Have fun shopping?"

"Yeah, until I ran into Mom-then it just got-awkward," she said, unsure if that was the right word. Walking over she sat down in the rocker and watched John again start to work on the crib. "She said she was sorry she hadn't come seen me-then invited us over for tree decorating."

John raised an eyebrow, "Us?"

"It was an offer-though I figured you wouldn't come because of the thought of being in the same room as Brody," she said as she thought of how tense everything had continued to be at work-how John was now switching between Price and Fish as his go-to man.

John put the pieces of the crib to the side and moved to her, almost kneeling in front of her, "I'll go if you need me. I'll do anything to help you repair your relationship with your family."

Her heart melted at his words. Pushing his hair behind his ear she smiled, "All the family I need is right here."

"Same here," he said as he leaned up for a kiss. "Oh, I got something earlier," he said as he picked a book up off the nightstand and handed it to her.

She smiled at seeing the name book, "Actually, I already have a name picked out-well, at least if it's a boy."

"Yeah?"

She nodded, "I wanted Ryan Conner-but after everything that crazy Hannah O'Connor put Starr through I changed my mind. How about Ryan Thomas McBain?"

"Perfect," he said, giving her another kiss, and feeling the baby kick against her stomach in approval. "See-he even likes his name."

* * *

Natalie rolled over and felt the emptiness of John's side of the bed and sighed. Opening her eyes she saw the clock and was surprised at how late in the morning it was. Knowing John was probably long gone she stretched and felt paper hit her arm. Sitting up she read it and smiled.

_N,_

_Went in to work for a few hours. If you feel like coming in stop by the office. I'll be home in time for tonight-if you still want to go._

_J_

She put the paper on the nightstand and got up. The past few days John and her had gone through multiple conversations about going or not. Late last night they'd decided to go-if tensions got too high they had an escape plan ready.

With him gone she had the perfect chance to wrap a few presents she'd gotten him. As she passed the nursery she stopped at seeing someone standing over the now complete crib. "What? Oh my God," she said as the person turned and she now had a gun pointed directly at her.

* * *

John put the receiver down again and sighed-the first two times he'd called the apartment he figured she was asleep-or in the shower. So he'd waited 30 minutes and tried again. With no response still he tried her cell phone, but Natalie wasn't picking up and his curiosity at what she was doing had turned into worry.

As he put his coat on the phone rang and he breathed a sigh of relief at thinking it was her, "Natalie?"

"Hey-no, sorry. It's Oliver. I was just coming back from interviewing a witness in the jewelry robbery case and wondered if it would be ok if I took the rest of the day off. Kyle and I were thinking of taking Sierra to see Santa for the first time."

"Yeah-sure," he said with a grin, thinking of how next year it would be him in Fish's shoes, celebrating firsts with his family. "Hey-are you near the apartment?"

"Coming up on it now-why?"

"Is Natalie's car in the parking lot?" he asked and felt like he was waiting for an eternity for an answer.

"Uhm-yeah," said Fish, dragging out the answer. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah, I'm sure it's nothing, but she's not answering the phone. Why don't you pull in and I'll be right there," he said as he didn't wait for Fish to answer. It was nothing-he was sure it was nothing-that the two men were going to walk in there and she would still be asleep, or so into wrapping presents she didn't hear the phone. However, he knew his intuition when it came to Natalie-the feeling he got when she was in trouble. And right now it was screaming at him to get to her.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: So I've changed (or will-after this is published) the last words Natalie speaks in the previous chapter because I'm tweaking the story a bit. Not much, but enough to change the direction I'm going. Ya'll enjoy-don't throw too many tomatoes at me please. ;) Until next time-ya'll are the best-PCGirl.

* * *

Natalie stared at the person in front of her. This made no sense, he couldn't be standing in front of her now. She had said her goodbyes to him a year ago—watched him slip from her in front of her eyes.

Turning, she looked behind her, wishing John would walk into the apartment right now. Facing him again she looked into the eyes of a man she once loved and saw the difference in them. She'd been here before when Cris came back, but then she didn't feel this when she saw him the first time, the sense of danger and fearing for her safety and that of her unborn child.

"How are you alive Jared?" she asked, trying to remain calm.

"Is that anyway to greet your husband," he asked as he came forward and pressed the gun into her stomach as he kissed her hard. She did the only thing she could think of and bit down on his lip. "You bitch," he said as he pulled back and wiped blood from his mouth. "Of course, you always liked it a little rough, didn't you Sparky?"

"Don't you dare call me that," she said as she felt the baby kick her, placing a hand on her stomach to try and quiet him. "You died in front of me. You died and left me to mourn you, not to mention what it did to Charlie to think he was the reason for your death, and now you come back in here with a gun pointed at me."

"Yeah, he said as he got a little closer and waved the gun at her belly. "Guess you didn't mourn for me very long though, did you?"

"Don't question my actions—answer the damn question, Jared. How the hell are you alive?"

"Well, see—it goes kind of like this," he said as he saw down in the rocker. "Back before jail—when I met Tess that first time in the hotel I already knew she was Jessica Buchanan. I'd spent the past two years learning everything about her and you—she just dropped into my lap like a gift from God," he said with a laugh.

The two years thing—she remembered John made a comment once, before she got together with the man in front of her, that there were two years missing from his life. That he'd fallen off the grid, and then suddenly shown up right before he went to jail. The realization hit her, and suddenly her simple fear turned into all out horror, "You're Mitch's disciple? This whole time you've been working for him?"

"You always were the smarter of the two," he smiled as he grabbed the arms of the rocker before getting up.

Natalie suddenly wondered if she disappeared would John think to dust the rocker for prints. "Mitch is in jail now—he can't hurt me."

"For now—but see, he's going to get a visitor soon. Who will slip him a pill, like the one I took at the hospital after he decided it would be better to shoot me instead of John. The pill—it makes your heart rate go down to nearly nothing. If the doctor or medic in the jail don't know any better—they think you're dead. That's when I'm to bring you to him. So let's go—Sparky. Don't want to keep him waiting," he said with a grin.

Natalie realized she had to think fast, and leave something for John to know what happened, "Fine—as long as you don't harm my child. But you have to let me leave a note for John. If he gets back here and I'm gone then he'll start to worry. I can make up something-tell him I'm going to the spa with Jess," she said-hoping he didn't know they sister's weren't exactly on speaking terms just now.

"Fine, but make it fast," he said as he motioned her into the hallway with the gun. 

* * *

"Natalie!" yelled John as he rushed into the apartment and was met with silence. On the drive over he tried to calm himself down-but it was useless and had only increased his worry. Rushing through the apartment and down the hall he found everything empty, and yet in place. As if she'd gotten ready for the day and just walked out to work.

"John?" called Fish from the kitchen. "She left a note," he said handing to John when he came back in.

John, went with Jess to the spa and then we'll going to look for prints to put on the rocker.

"This makes no sense," he said as he noticed how she'd added the words 'to put' as if they were an afterthought.

"I guess she made up with Jessica. The note seems innocent enough."

John shook his head at Fish, "She left her purse," he said as he pointed to the bag sitting on the counter where she'd left it yesterday. He turned and walked back down the hallway to the nursery-everything was just like he left it this morning. But still-he could feel it-Natalie had left him this note for a reason. Suddenly he realized what she was saying-someone had been here, someone she had gone with who she knew, but didn't trust-at least not at the moment.

Standing in the doorway he didn't move, but turned his head to yell at Fish, "Oliver-her keys should be in her bag-go get her forensic kit out of the car." He wanted to be wrong-wanted to believe the note was right and she'd made up with Jessica-and they'd gone to pamper themselves to celebrate and that later tonight his family would come back home to him, and yet-he couldn't believe that was going to happen either.

* * *

John tried to remain calm as he walked across the bullpen and to Bo's office. He'd taken the prints himself from the apartment and ran them himself-so he knew the report in his pocket was right, but he had no clue what it meant.

Knocking he waited to hear Bo's voice before entering. "Everything ok, John? Figured you would be headed over to Viki's soon for the party," smiled Bo. He'd talked to Natalie enough over the past few days to know she was apprehensive of going to her mom's, but he'd reminded her that even if Jessica couldn't get past what had happened right now that someday she would.

"No-it's not," he said, ignoring the second statement-he didn't have time to think about that, or any inclination to do so-there was a bigger problem right now. "And what I'm about to say can't leave this room except to tell Nora. The rest of the Buchanan's need to be kept in the dark for the time being."

"Sounds serious," he said as he sat up and listened to John tell how he'd felt something wasn't right when he couldn't get Natalie to answer earlier. How he'd had Fish meet him there and they found the note from Natalie.

"So I ran the fingerprints I found on the rocker-if I hadn't ran it myself I would think it was wrong," he said as he handed the report to his friend and Natalie's uncle and watched his expression go from one of curiosity to shock to worry. "I wasn't expecting this."

"Neither was I," said John with a half laugh. "I mean I keep thinking of how he was dead-how Natalie saw him die in front of her, and yet-."

"He's still alive," said Bo as he handed the paper back. "Sounds like someone else we know."

John nodded in silence, not wanting to speak out loud that he'd already thought of that and that scared him the most.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I feel like I need to give an apology. We don't have internet at home right now, so updates will be farther between than normal. Apologies all around. Hope ya'll enjoy-it's not much, but maybe it will do. Until next time-PCGirl.

* * *

"Thanks, Aaron. Let me know what you find," said John as he hung up the phone in his office. He'd spent a long time with Bo last night trying to work out a plan. They hadn't gotten anywhere except to not go and interrogate Mitch Lawrence because it could get back to Jared that they already knew.

The fact that Jared Banks was still alive boggled his mind. Bo and him talked about having the body that was in the coffin exhumed, but without Natalie being around as the next of kin to approve it, or letting onto Charlie that something was up it couldn't happen.

So he'd called his friend Aaron from Quantico to go in as deep as he could on a background check for the not so dead Jared Banks. Aaron and him and gone through training together and been partners their first year in the FBI so he trusted the man with his life—he knew he'd get to the bottom of it and barely make a ripple in what he was doing.

When the words on the computer screen blurred he knew he needed to get some sleep. It'd been a long time since he woke up next to Natalie the previous morning. He was deciding whether to just crash on a cot here instead of the apartment when his office door opened without a knock and Rex walked in, "Good morning to you too, Balsom."

"Yeah—whatever. Where's Natalie?"

"Sleeping, I assume," he said, hoping that was at least true.

"Gigi went by Llanfair earlier—Viki is upset that she didn't come to the party last night. I offered to talk to Natalie. See what's going on. Can you tell her to call me?"

"Sure. When I hear from her I'll let her know," he said and watched Natalie's brother leave just as quickly as he came in. Leaning back on his desk he took a breath and spoke out loud to an empty room, "Natalie—where are you?" 

* * *

Natalie stirred on the cot and the feeling of the harsh blanket on her made her remember exactly where she was before she even opened her eyes.

She heard a 'Good Morning, Sparky' come from nearby and grimaced at the word. Once upon a time she would have loved hearing those words again, but not now—and definitely not in these circumstances.

Opening her eyes she saw him sitting in a chair in the small cabin they were in—he'd blindfolded her on the drive up, but she knew the sounds around her. Had come up to either of her parent's getaways enough to know that it was never truly quiet up here.

"Sleep well?" he asked her, and she noticed again how his eyes were dark. How had she never seen it before? When she'd sat there and told him about Mitch—what he'd put her through, Jared had been sympathetic then, never letting on that she was badmouthing his leader.

Natalie nodded in a lie—she'd forced herself to relax enough to sleep, but had kept thinking of what she needed to do next. She hoped John was already on Jared's trail—that all she did was hold tight and keep Jared from taking her to Mitch, because it was at that point that she truly worried she'd fall off the grid and John might never find her.

"So—does Jessica have to be worried about her safety as well?"

"No," he shook his head. "The Master has given up having his daughter in his life. That her soul will sadly have to be lost."

Lucky Jessica, she thought with a smile and sat up on the bed. In the wee hours this morning she'd started a plan to keep herself and this baby safe until John could get to them and it was time to put the plan into action. 

* * *

John stood at the edge of the docks and looked out onto the water. This had been the place years ago that his life had changed-where he and Natalie had given up on their relationship and walked away from what really mattered.

It was while they were apart that Jared Banks had come in and won Natalie's heart. Back then he'd thought it was the best thing for her—to find someone that treated her right, maybe better than he ever did.

But the man had been a disciple of Mitch's the whole time—waiting for the moment to hand her over to a man that had terrorized her before.

He wouldn't let Laurence terrorize her again—it had been 5 days since she'd gone missing, but he had eyes on the man. And now he was standing here waiting for Aaron to show up with whatever dirt he could dig up.

Hearing something drop into the water he turned around and grinned, "Hey, Romeo," he said, calling him the nickname that had been bestowed on him in training when he continually tried to woo any girl they ran into at the bar.

"Yo, Irish. You couldn't find a nicer place to meet up?" he grinned as he walked out and shook John's hand.

"Natalie's family owns most everything in town—this was the only place I could think of that we wouldn't run into them. What did you find?" he asked as he took the manila envelope and began looking through the paperwork.

Before he could look over the paperwork they heard a noise behind them and instantly they both drew their weapons, "Come out now," he shouted and put his gun down when Rex walked out. "Are you trying to get yourself killed, Balsom?"

"No—who are you?" he asked, looking Aaron over.

"This is a friend from the FBI—Aaron. Aaron this is Natalie's brother who apparently followed me here," he said, running a hand through his hair. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to know where my sister is."

"She's—."

"I'm not stupid, McBain. I've been asking and no one has seen her in a few days. And when I asked Bo he tried to give me the brush off and talk about something else. If she's in danger I deserve to know."

John looked to Aaron who gave him a shrug, "It's your call."

"Fine. Jared's alive and is trying to take her to Mitch Laurence," he said calmly-he'd had a few days to process the news, but it didn't make it any easier as he watched her brother's face waiver between fear and panic. 


	7. Chapter 7

Natalie stood up and stretched-turning her back on Jared and staring out the window at the fresh, undisturbed snow. She'd wondered if she could make this believable, make the words sound real and poured every ounce of doubt she had about John into her voice and prayed it would work. "There's something in all of this Jared that I don't understand or believe."

"What's that?" he asked, shifting in his chair some.

"Our feelings for each other-you may be a con, and you may be one of Mitch's disciples, but your feelings for me were real. Weren't they?" she asked, turning back around and looking into his eyes-they were still cold, but for a moment she saw a break.

"What I felt for you I was told to do so by Mitch. Besides-apparently it wasn't that real to you since you got knocked up by McBain so quickly."

"It was a one night stand," she lied. "I had lost you and couldn't picture my life without you. You know how John loves to do the white knight thing. He's not the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We were going to conquer the world together-remember, Jared? You and me. We didn't need anyone else."

"Well, there's someone else right now," he said motioning his free hand towards her stomach.

"Then we give the baby back to John and run. Can you really see yourself watching Mitch be with me every night? Touching me and eventually his child growing inside of me," she asked, walking towards Jared and trying not to gag at the thought of Mitch touching her. "What do you say, Jared? We can still make all of our dreams come true."

* * *

Rex looked at the two other men as if they'd told him the Easter Bunny was real. This wasn't possible-for Jared to not only be alive, but for him to be a disciple of Mitch's the entire time he was involved with his sister. "So what did Mitch say when you questioned him?" he finally got out, and realized that John had not done that. "You haven't questioned him? Why the hell not?"

"Because he doesn't know we're onto him, Balsom. We wouldn't even know it was Jared if Natalie hadn't left a clue."

"She went willingly with that freak?"

"She might not have had a choice-think about it. We both know that's how Natalie is-she'll put everyone else's safety ahead of her own, including the baby."

"Which could be a good or bad thing once it's here," he said to himself, not noticing John nod at the fact that he'd already thought of that. "So what's this meeting about anyways?"

"Aaron ran a deep background of Jared before he was in prison. Let's see what we found out?" he asked as he pulled out the paperwork he'd been given and started looking it over.

"Well?" asked Rex anxiously.

John ignored the plea and kept reading, "Just the area where Jared was when he dropped off the map for two years-it's close to that hotel you and Natalie went to before Napa."

"I never did trust the guy that sent us there. You think he's a disciple too?"

"Worth a look around-Aaron?"

"I'll call in a few favors and have feelers put out in the area. If Mitch's compound is near there at least we'll know where to go if Mitch does get out. Can you give me the information on the hotel?" he asked to Rex.

"Sure," he said as the two of them left John to stand on the docks in silence and hope that they could get Natalie before Mitch did, at if not she would continue to use caution with Jared. 

* * *

"No. No," shouted Jared as he finally stood up and began walking around the room in a crazy fashion. "He told me you would do this. Told me you would try to seduce me into getting what you want."

"I'm not seducing you, Jared," she said and was surprised at the tears that were filling her eyes. "It's real, Jared. You might have been playing me in the beginning, but that all changed at the Ranch. We made love for the first time that night and everything changed."

Throwing his hands in the air Natalie wondered exactly how close to the edge he was to needing to be at St Anne's, "It has to change back now. I was wrong for doing that-I should have stayed on course and have seen the error of my ways."

Walking closer to him she felt the baby give a sharp kick, but kept on with the plan, "You really believe what we had was a mistake?" she asked seductively and suddenly crumpled the ground as the first labor pain hit her. 

* * *

"Will you hurry up and make your shot?" snarked John as he watched Aaron continue to study the pool table at Rodi's. Aaron had left town for a few days to help set up the surveillance on Mitch's compound, but had decided to stay a few longer in case they caught an actual lead to Natalie.

"Do you rush Natalie when she's making a shot?"

"No, because she would have run the table in the time that's it taken you to make this one shot. So how about a little less chatting a little more playing?" he grinned, glad that his friend had suggested they get away from the shop talk and try and relax some.

Aaron just laughed and took his shot, sinking the ball in on a bank shot. As he stood back up he gave a silent whistle motion to John and nodded to the door. Looking behind him John saw Jessica walk in the door and shook his head, "That's Natalie's sister," he said pausing a moment as Brody came into view "And that is a former Navy SEAL."

"Who you punched with no problem-if you can take him, Irish then I know I can," he teased. "Seriously though-I see why you chose Natalie over Jessica."

John shook his had-the reason he was with Natalie had nothing to do with looks, but he still smirked at the comment, "You have spent way too much time around Brett and Craig in the past few years. Maybe we should work together more often."

"I think I'll pass-and for the record I enjoy talking out my ass sometimes," he said, referencing their other two FBI buddies perchance for speaking before they think. "Here comes trouble," he said as he went back to studying the table.

"John," spoke Jessica as she walked over and John turned to her.

"Hey, Jessica. Can I help you with something?" he asked, sitting back onto the edge of the table.

"I just wondered if Natalie is happy about how much she's hurting our Mom with her refusal to return her calls," she said, and then looked behind John when Aaron made a choking noise. "Can I help you?"

John looked back at Aaron with a silent warning, "Pay no attention to him," he said turning his attention back to Jessica. "It has nothing to do with your mom, Jessica-." He stopped his comment when his phone went off and he saw it was from Bo. "Bo-what's up?" he asked and then walked over to the jukebox for some privacy. "You're sure? Ok-Aaron and I are on our way."

Walking back over to the group he saw that the conversation had no continued with him there, "Sorry-I just got called into a case. Aaron?" he asked, his expression still stoic.

"I think I could have taken the SEAL," joked Aaron as they got outside and he watched John take a deep breath. "Ok-no more joking-what's up?"

John still didn't say anything until both men were in the car and they were leaving the parking lot, "That was Bo-a newborn infant was just abandoned at the hospital."

"Only the infant?"

John nodded, hoping this wasn't his child, but if it was that Natalie was still safe.


	8. Chapter 8

John rushed off the elevator and immediately saw Bo standing outside a room looking through a window, "Bo—what's going on?"

Bo smiled at John's urgency at the situation and nodded to the window, "Say hello to your son first, John."

"My son," he smiled and watched the doctor and nurse check out the baby in the next room. They'd stuck a small blue hat on his head, but he could see dark hair peeking out from underneath it. "Are we sure? Where's Natalie?" 

"I don't know, but this was with him," he said as he pulled out an evidence bag with a note in it.  
John recognized the handwriting immediately as Natalie's—on it were the words _Ryan Thomas McBain_. "I—I have a son," he smiled again and looked at Aaron who was standing next to him silently. 

"Yeah, hopefully he looks like Natalie," he grinned and patted him hard on the back. "Congratulations, Irish," he said, then took the lead on the questioning since he could tell John was in too deep to ask about specifics at the moment. "When did the baby come in? Did anyone see who dropped him off?" 

Bo shook his head, "No—he was left sitting in a car seat in the Emergency Room waiting area. It was so busy no one noticed until the room actually started clearing out that he was there," he said and stopped as the doctor came out. "How's he doing?" 

"Great. He's early—probably more than a month, but he seems healthy. I would say he's around 36-48 hours old. We do want to keep him here for a few days for observation." 

"Good—this is the father," he said smiling at John. "Can he see him?" 

"Sure. We'll move him over to the nursery when you are done," he said and walked off. 

"You go in by yourself, John—I'm going to go see if the security cameras caught anything," said Bo, and then Aaron agreeing to join him. 

John walked into the room and looked down in the plastic bassinette they had set him in. All he could think of was how small he was—but he was here, his and Natalie's love for each other wrapped into a small human being.

"Do you want to hold him?" asked the nurse and smiled when John seemed to get nervous. "He'll be fine. You can sit in the chair if you want and I'll bring him to you."

When she placed Ryan in his arms John couldn't say a word at first—not until the nurse had left them alone and then no more than a whisper, "Hey kid—I'm your dad. Your mom will be here soon—she loves you just as much as I do," and then silently prayed he was right.

* * *

"You ready for this?" laughed Bo as they walked off the elevator and towards the nursery for John to take Ryan home.

John left out a long sigh, "It scares the hell out of me, boss. I mean seriously—are they really sure they want a guy like me taking a baby out of here?"

Bo smiled at watching his friend—the past few days had been crazy as he, Fish, and Aaron had chased leads on the person that dropped off the carrier at the ER while John stayed for the most part at the hospital with Ryan, leaving only this morning to finish setting the apartment up for the homecoming.

Things had turned tense yesterday when John had run randomly into Jessica at the hospital. She'd figured out that Ryan was John and Natalie's baby, and Natalie was not in the hospital. Bo had gotten a visit from his brother last night on what exactly was going on, but was able to divert all questions for now.

"When does Michael's plane get in?"

"Later tonight." He'd called Michael the night before after the Jessica incident to cut off anything she might call and say to Marcie about her delinquent sister. He'd told enough—that Natalie was missing, but they were sure that it wasn't of her own choosing. Anymore and he worried his sister-in-law would squeal to Jessica before they were ready for the truth to come out. The brother's had hung up and a few minutes later Michael was calling back saying that Marcie insisted on coming out on to Llanview to help him with the baby.

Turning the corner John gritted his teeth at the sight of Clint Buchanan standing there with Ryan's carrier in his hands, "Excuse me—what do you think you are doing?"

"Taking my grandson home—what does it look like?"

"The hell you are," he said as he heard somewhere in the background Bo telling him to take it easy. "You didn't want anything to do with him a few months ago—tried to take away the trust fund that Natalie had set up for him. Why now?"

"Because his mother obviously wants nothing to do with him, and I'm not letting strangers raise a Buchanan heir."

"His mother will be home soon enough," he said as he looked down at his son sleeping soundly in the carrier, despite the raised voices around him. "And I'm his father—so he won't be around strangers."

"Give up John—I have more lawyers than you've ever met. Besides—people around you seem to be in danger almost continuously. No judge in his right mind will grant custody to someone with your track record. And then if Natalie does return do you think they'll let a woman who abandoned her child have him?"

"Did you ever think maybe she wasn't the one to drop him off? That she's-," he stopped. Anymore and he could just lose Natalie forever.

"John," spoke a voice quietly behind him and he saw Vicki Banks standing there. "Where is my daughter? Please tell me."

John looked at Bo—"She was taken a few weeks ago from the apartment. We're pretty sure she did it to protect the baby, and now with him being here—I can't go into more without putting her in harm's way. I'll bring her home safely, but right now I just need to take my son home," he said as he took Ryan without argument from Clint and left.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I really should hold this chapter hostage until I see another Jolie fic being updated, but I'll be good. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time-PCGirl.

* * *

Natalie sat there looking out the window—it had been days since Jared had made her hand over the baby to a stranger. He had said the woman would take the baby to John, but how could she trust him? For all she knew her son was now being raised by strangers, and that he would turn up years from now at her door like she did with Vicki and question why she abandoned him like she did.

She'd snuck bonding moments with the boy during the night, memorizing every aspect of him. He had John's eyes—in the dark she could see how they were identical to John's in both shape and shade of blue. That crystal clear blue which reminds you of the ocean.

But for the most part when Jared was around she pretended she didn't care about the baby. That somehow it would make it more believable that she wanted him over John. Now she just felt like a horrible mother—one that abandoned her child, and maybe she didn't even deserve him and for a few hours she thought of letting this charade continue—either running off with Jared or letting herself be with Mitch Laurence again. Anything to protect both John and Ryan—the only two men that she knew would truly always have her heart.

Then she realized she couldn't give up—that she'd been a fighter for so long, and this wasn't the time to give up and let everyone else have their way. She'd watched Jared's movements for the past few days—and was pretty sure exactly where he kept the keys for the vehicle he had on the premises.

What she didn't know was the logistics of where they were—were there guards outside? Was she completely wrong and not on Llantano mountain after all? How close was she to the base of the mountain or the nearest cabin? Run or try and find the car he'd brought her up in. All these questions continued to swirl in her mind as she waited for Jared's return.

But it didn't matter—if she didn't make it then at least she prayed that John and Ryan were together and John would always protect him, and tell him when he was older how much she had truly loved him.

When the door opened she smiled at seeing Jared, a smile she felt was becoming faker by the hour and hoped he hadn't realized it just yet.

* * *

John felt Ryan give a sigh as he fell asleep-he should put him down now, maybe lay down himself-but he couldn't. He'd talked to Bo—who again had been able to divert questions pertaining to Natalie's abduction. But he knew Clint Buchanan—knew the man would go to the airwaves if it meant finding his daughter, yet if he truly cared for her wellbeing he would leave it to Bo and Aaron to find her—that letting Mitch and his disciples know she didn't leave on her own could put her in further danger.

Hearing the knock on the door he walked over and answered, "Hey Mike," he said as his brother patted him on the shoulder while Marcie stood behind him holding Gabe.

"Hey bro," he said as he looked at the small form sleeping on his brother's shoulder. "Hey newest McBain," he said as he ran a finger on his cheek and a sigh was given in response. "Those McBain genes are strong-he looks just like you. Poor kid."

"I could say the same for Gabe," he said as he closed the door.

"Yeah, but at least I was the better looking brother," he grinned as he placed the suitcase next to the door and took Gabe from Marcie, "Look buddy. Say hello to your cousin."

"Aye," he said with a smile. Na-ie?" he asked as he looked up at John with those brown eyes he had inherited from his dad.

"She's out, she'll be back soon," he said as Ryan became fussy. "Shhh, guy. Mama will be back soon," he said rubbing his son's back.

Marcie held out her hands, "Let me see him-Eve taught me a trick she did with you and Michael that worked every time. Works for Gabe-let's see just how strong those McBain traits are."

"Any word yet?" asked Michael as they watched Marcie walk over to the picture window, rocking Ryan and humming a familiar tune.

"Nothing. We had a close call with Clint earlier leaving the hospital. If that man ruins this whole thing and puts her in more danger," he sighed, unable to finish the sentence.

"You said you have an idea who it is that took her?"

"Yeah, and they ran a trace on any particles from the items that were with Ryan when he showed up. I should call the lab," he said as he rubbed his eyes, and suddenly wondered where he had sat down his phone.

"John, when was the last time you slept? Or ate?" he asked, knowing it was always Natalie that made sure he did both when he was on a big case-and John always got burnt out the most when the case dealt with her.

"I-I really don't know," he said as Marcie came back with a baby that was fast asleep. "Let me lay him down," he said as he took his son back.

"Ok, then you are going to take a nap-Marcie, can you put something together?"

"Of course," she smiled and went towards the kitchen.

John walked into the bedroom and laid Ryan down in the bassinet and watched him sleep for a minute before laying down himself, "Alright kid-let's get a little bit of sleep, ok?"

He wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep when he heard his cell phone go off-laying there in between consciousness and sleep he heard Michael say it was him and then heard footsteps coming down the hall. He could tell by the tone that Michael was trying to calm down the person, and then hearing him say Ryan was safe he knew who it was before Michael made it to the door, "Natalie?" he whispered and got a nod from his brother.

Taking the phone John felt a sudden release of anxiety at knowing she was still alive, "Hey."

"Hey," she spoke softly. "Is Ryan ok? He was so early-I've been worried-."

"He's perfect. Strong like both his parents," he said as he looked down at his son. "Are you ok?"

"I'm sore and tired, but ok. Jared-."

"I know. Where is he now?"

"I don't know—I knocked him out with a vase and just started running. I think I'm on Llantano Mountain—I found the nearest cabin and broke in hoping there was an alarm system."

"Ok-I want you to start snooping around-find any piece of mail you can with an address on it," he said as he walked down the hallway to leave before turning and going back in to give Ryan a kiss.

"Here—I found an address," she said as she rattled it off then yawned.

"You can't go to sleep on me," he said as he handed address she'd given to Mike and mouthed Call Bo.

"I'm so tired though," she said as she walked to the couch and laid down.

"No, you need to stay awake-" he said as he tried to think of something that would keep her talking long enough for him to get there. Watching Michael grab both coats out of the closet he shook his head, "You need to stay here."

"She's going to need medical attention, John. We'll be there before the paramedics are," he said as he pulled out his cell phone and called Bo.

John nodded as they made it to the car, "So, I hate to say it, but both Aaron and Mike say Ryan looks like me."

"Who is Aaron?"

"He was my first partner with the FBI—he's been helping me find you," he said as he suddenly realized where Aaron had said he was going to look around at tonight. Handing the phone off to Michael he motioned for his brother's phone and smirked as Michael said something stupid regarding John's looks.

"Yo, Irish. I know I said I don't do diapers, but I'm starving. What's for dinner Dad?"

John laughed, "I have Natalie on the phone. She escaped—we don't know how far behind Jared his from her, but she made it to a cabin on Llantano Mountain and I have an address.

"Shoot," he said as he stopped at a pull off." "Forty Five Timber Lane. Yeah, I think I saw that road a few minutes ago. ETA should be 5 minutes."

"Thanks bud," he said as he hung up and got back on the phone with Natalie, "You still there?"

"Yeah, but John—I really want to sleep."

"I know, but you have to wait for Aaron. He'll be there soon and so will I. Just stay up for me—ok?"

"I'll try," she said sleepily and he knew he was losing her quickly."

"I love you, Natalie," he said and sighed when he didn't get a response. As he merged onto the highway that went up the mountain he pushed the pedal to the floor and prayed neither he nor Aaron were too late.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Apologies for the delay-real life took over for a few weeks and kicked the muse out. She's back now, but not completely happy with the ending of the chapter so apologies for that too. Until next time-ya'll are the best-PCGirl

* * *

Aaron turned off the lights to his truck as he pulled onto the road. He'd been on the side of this damn mountain for most of the day and had been ready to call it a night. Had figured he'd go back to John's place and shoot the breeze with him, do their normal routine when it came to a case that seemed to be getting away from them instead of getting closer to solving.

He and John had been in deep together many times, but nothing like this. Nothing where he watched his friend's emotions pass over his face so easily. He'd never pictured John as the parenting type, while it looked good on the man what would look even better was to have the mother of his child by his side.

Flicking his flashlight at each mailbox he saw the house number and pulled onto the shoulder and readied his gun before he even got out of the car. In a normal case he would check the perimeter, but he felt he didn't have time. This was one of those times they trained you at Quantico for—where speed was more important than security.

Walking to the window he saw Natalie asleep on the couch, he smiled at reaching her before Jared did. Going in he leaned down and woke her softly, "Hey gorgeous," he spoke, his southern accent coming out.

"John?" she asked and her eyes fluttered to see a blonde male with striking green eyes looking back at her instead.

"No, ma'am. The name is Aaron, but I'll get you to him soon enough—and your boy also."

"The hell you will," spoke a voice behind them and Aaron looked up to see another man standing in the doorway.

"Jared Banks, I presume," he said as he stood slowly, his gun still in his hand.

"Put your gun on the floor and kick it over here," he said, not impressed that he was known. "So who are you? A newbie with the LPD? A friend of McBain's from the FBI? How'd you tell John it was me that took you, you slut," he spoke as he looked at Natalie who had fallen back asleep.

"He's just that good," smiled Aaron when he felt his back pocket buzz and knew the calvary was here.

* * *

"Damn it," cursed John as he hung up the phone and looked at his brother. "Something's wrong. He didn't answer."

"Maybe he's just taking care of Natalie and couldn't get to the phone," said Michael as he held on while John took a quick left and shut off the headlights.

"No, it's a different phone—the one the FBI gives you in case of emergencies only. Not answering lets your partner know you are in danger. Take this—only use it if you have to," he said as he pulled out his extra service piece from the glove box and handed it to Michael and jumped out of the car and went towards the house.

"John—what are you going to do if you have to shoot Jared?" whispered Michael as they got close to the house.

John hadn't thought of that—had only one thought on his mind on the way up—to get Natalie to safety and never let her go ever again. He could make out the figures in the cabin before he got near the window, and went towards the back—finding a door unlocked he entered, motioning for Michael to stop before coming in.

He listened to Aaron's taunting Jared and remembered not so long ago when it was Jared doing the taunting to Mitch. And yet now he knew none of the taunts were real. That John had probably foiled their plans by going to Napa.

"You know this is the second plan of yours where you were to bring Natalie to Mitch that's failed. What do you have to say for yourself? I've heard what he does to his followers that fail him—they seem to leave the flock and are never heard from again."

"Who says it's failed. I'll be gone long before McBain gets up here—and you, well you'll be dead," he laughed.

"You sure about that?" he questioned as he made eye contact with John and smiled.

John almost felt like the world slowed down as he watched Jared shoot the gun at Aaron. Later he'd think how Michael was wrong—he never second guessed about shooting the man and watched both men fall.

* * *

John nodded as the doctor walked out of the exam room and went in, looking at Aaron now sitting on the bed with his arm in a sling, "How are you feeling?"

"Sore, but I'll be ok. Besides—chicks dig scars," he grinned. "How's Natalie?"

"Still being examined—she hasn't woke up but Michael's pretty sure it's just exhaustion from the whole ordeal. Listen—I never got to say—,"

"Stop," cut off Aaron. "I was doing my job. This is what I'm trained to do—it just happened to be that this time is was to help my friend. That's all."

"Yeah, I guess so," smirked John. "You planning on sticking around?" glad at the thought of having someone who always had his back at work again.

"You know—I just might. Irish and Romeo together again," he laughed.

John nodded and gave a half grin, "Let me go check on Natalie. I'll see you around."

"See ya," he said and watched his friend leave and thought about how it wouldn't be that bad to settle down and see what else life had to offer.


	11. Chapter 11

Natalie felt like she was in a train tunnel, with the sounds from the end of it coming at her, but not actually being able to see what was out there—and yet she heard most of it clear as day. She remembered the two gunshots, and then John's voice followed by a kiss on the forehead. He'd been there—she thought it was the entire time—remembered hearing his voice at times.

There had been other voices—Michael's and Rex's, as well as her Roxy's. It was comforting to know they were there. Now she felt like she was finally reaching the end of the tunnel and listening to Michael and John talk.

"Why don't you go home and rest some, John? Ryan needs his father."

"Just until she wakes up, Mike. Do you think the doctors are right? That it's just exhaustion and nothing more serious."

"She's fine, Johnny. Her vitals are normal—she just went through a horrid ordeal where she probably couldn't sleep well for fear of what Jared might do to her. Give her time."

John rolled his eyes at his brother, "What do you know?"

"Can you two knock it off for a minute?" asked Natalie, surprised her voice came out so hoarsely.

"Hey," smiled John for what felt like the first time in weeks. Seeing those blue eyes looking back at him again made any fears he'd just had slip away. "Welcome back," he smiled before giving her a deep kiss.

"How long was I out?" she asked as she watched Michael quietly leave the room so they could have some privacy.

"A day and a half. Rex came by, and Roxy. Anyone else and I pretty much told them to come back later. Natalie—I," he stopped, getting choked.

"How's Ryan? It killed me when they took him from me. All I could see was another situation where he was raised by strangers. I was so scared," she said as her eyes filled with tears.

"He's fine. He's perfect. He's been spending time with his Aunt Marcie and Grandma Viki. Mike's been trying to keep me from going off the ledge."

"So I heard just now. When you rescued me I remember there being two shots. Who?"

"Aaron—he was my original partner from Quantico. And Jared—he's going away for a long time. Not just for you—but for the other deaths from before. Whether it was him or not—Nora's making the case so he can never touch our family again."

"Poor Charlie," she said and watched John nod. "You understand I felt like I had to go with him. Not just for my safety, but Ryan's too. He had a gun pointed at my stomach, and all I could think of was protecting him."

"I know," smiled John at her thinking he would be upset at her leaving. "But I got the note and figured out pretty quick what it meant. He obviously didn't know you and Jess aren't talking."

Natalie nodded and asked a question she was wondering, "What is she saying about me?"

"Now? I don't know. But she was pretty harsh to you before the truth came out. Thought you would actually abandon your child," he said, getting angry at how her sister just abandoned her so quickly. "You know what—it doesn't matter. You are here—safe, and I'm not letting you go ever again," he said as he leaned forward for a kiss. "I need to do something first—and then how about I go by and bring Ryan to see his mom."

"I'd like that. Hurry back," she said after he gave her another kiss and left the room.

* * *

Natalie looked at the door and smiled at seeing Aaron walk in, his arm in a sling, "Hey. Aaron, right?"

He nodded and smiled, "You were kind of out of it—wasn't sure if you remembered. Listen, Irish has me sitting out here while he left to get Ryan. He said no visitors, but—it's your sister. Do you—?"

Natalie sat there and thought—John had told her the comments that had been said at Rodi's. What her sister's opinion of her was just a few days ago and wondered if it had changed now that the full story was out, "I guess so. But first, Aaron—thank you for everything."

"Just doing my job, ma'am," he smiled.

"No, it was more than that. From what Michael told me you were keeping John grounded. It's not an easy task, trust me—I know from experience," she laughed. "I'm glad you were here to help."

Aaron blushed at her words, "Irish and I have been deep in the trenches before. We always knew the other one had our back. As many times as he'd put his ass on the line for me it was the least I could do. But you're welcome," he smiled and closed the door.

Natalie fidgeted with the blanket while waiting for Jessica to come in, and looking up felt like a child in the Principal's office when their parents arrived, having taken off from work to be here, "Hey."

"Hey," she said and took a seat near the bed, but not too close. "Listen—whatever you may have heard."

"You should have known better, Jess," she snapped and felt a rush of anger at the whole ordeal of the past months coming out. "We are twins—we have always had this connection when the other is in trouble. And this time I was and you thought the worst of me."

"Can you blame me?"

"Maybe for missing the Christmas dinner, but then you saw Ryan had been born and thought I'd just abandoned him," she said and watched her sister's reaction—she didn't know Natalie knew that part also. "I don't abandon my children. Not after everything Roxy put me through growing up. Not after seeing Bree cry for you when you were Tess after losing Nash."

"That's harsh, Natalie."

"You've been going around saying this about me while I was being held hostage by not one, but two ex-husbands. So don't tell me what's harsh. So if you came in here to be all sweet and sisterly right now you can forget it. I'm not there yet."

Jessica stood up—shocked at Natalie's demeanor and that her sister had seen right through her act. Nodding she went to the door and turned before leaving, "I really am sorry about Jared—and also about what I said. Hopefully we'll be sisters again soon."

Natalie nodded and waited until the door was closed before she let the tears come. It had been hard to say what she had, but the truth was when nearly everything around you is crumbled you have to finish cleaning it up before you begin to rebuild.


End file.
